Back in Black - But Still Average

Any poor bugger who tuned into the final minutes of the All Whites vs Iraq this morning could be forgiven for thinking that we’d just qualified for the semis of the Confederations Cup.

Our lads were partying like it was 1999, only it wasn’t and sadly for us, we hadn’t.

Yes, the nil all bore draw had meant the All Whites had picked up their first competitive point – not plural – in a FIFA senior men's competition, but it also heralded their exit from a tournament that will live long in the memory for all the wrong reasons.

Humiliated first up by a Spanish side that could have put ten past us if it wasn’t for some atrocious officiating and poor finishing on their part set the tone. Yes it was always going to be a huge mismatch but no one, not even the Spanish, expected such a cake walk. This is international football after all.

Another amateurish showing against the average Saffas meant that the game against Iraq was effectively, barring a miracle and major turnabout in form, a dead rubber. Saddam’s mob are only ranked five places ahead of little ol’ NZ in the FIFA world rankings which makes a scoreless draw even the more disappointing.

Not to the players though, obviously. It’s a sad day when the last match of your tournament ends in a goalless draw and you celebrate like you have won the cup! The world was watching this morning - well maybe just a few Iraqis tuning in from the caves of Afghanistan – and we made fools of ourselves. Again.

I can't help but compare the performance at this tourney of the men to that of the Under 17 girls at theirs early this year. That really was amateurs verse professionals, but did they lose credibility in their performances? Far from it.

Don’t be fooled what the NZFA says about this tournament preparing the team for the World Cup qualifiers. Their abysmal performance at the Confederations Cup has wound the credibility clock back 15 years. This is why Oceania will never get direct entry into the World Cup.

There is however one silver lining to this particular cloud; I was able to use the All Whites as a perfect example for my ten year olds in how not to defend.

Oh and did anybody else notice that the two 'best' results of this last fortnight (against the Eyeties and the Iraqis) were achieved whilst the team wore black, not white?

Might be something in that.