Guest Post - Top 5 Comic Book Movies

Fellow fan boy and one time lady boy Lancey 'Lillian' Craig wasn't happy with my Top 5 last week and instead contributed his own. In the best interests of fairness - and not because he's threatened to publish the photos I gave him that he promised he'd never show anyone - I've allowed him the first ever guest post here on ClubDes:

1. Conan.

Wicked comics back in the day and Arnold played a mean Conan. Although seeing Grace Jones as a warrior colleague for him was a real disappointment; yes, it did turn me on a little but not in a pleasant way. I loved it though when he banged the witch then threw her in the fire! It also blew me away how he started as an enslaved scrawny kid turning some wheel, then 20 years later he's still turning that same damn wheel but somehow consumed a helluva lot of protein at the same time! Krom!!!

2. Batman

Of course seeing the originals in the younger days I thought it was the shit! Having the Dark Knight hit the big screen was a wet fantasy of mine come true!

3. Iron Man 1 and 2

Being released in an age where Iron Man can be brought to life with the best Animitronicallyorgasmic known technology to date made this movie. If this was released in the earlier days we would have had Robocop on fishing lines with the actor being Tourette’s kung fu master Steven Segal or Jean Claude God-damn! Thank god that never happened.

4. Superman.

I can't rule out the Man of Steel. He was a powerful figure in my life. The comics I read of him must have numbered in the hundreds and what kid never fantasized about being him?! Even to this day I'm trying to figure out how he turned back time to save Lois Lane. Can someone please give me the mathematical theory behind spinning the world round and round and what if he had spun it clock wise as opposed to counter-clockwise???

5. Flash

I'm almost ashamed to say it only because I know now how terrible the film actually was but as a kid you don't critique story lines or cinematography. The graphics back then looked so real and the Flash was so cut I started sticking plasters on my TV screen. I loved the Flash comics growing up and when the first movie came out I watched it over and over again.