Not surprising really because I’m an ideas man, not really a doer as Mrs ClubDes is only too happy to point out. Admittedly she starts plenty of things started but seldom finishes them so we make a good pair really.
I know what’s wrong with the damn thing and no, it’s not a hard drive chock full of ‘the good stuff’. The video card is stuffed and I’ve proven it by using a loner from work that I really should have kept because no one would have noticed if I had. But I am an honest lad and didn’t.
That was about two years ago and since then have made three concerted efforts to find a replacement, mostly under harassment of not being a doer, I should add. The first involved me contacting Hewlett Packard directly only to have the will to live sucked from me by their helpless desk and their incessant need to tick every fucken box on their ‘450 mandatory checks to make before logging a fault’ list.
The second involved Chef because he’s quite clued up and not just with food. He was very helpful and we got to the point where we tested two replacement cards that were new, but faulty. And about there he left it, possibly because I lost interest and he picked me, quite correctly I might add, as a hopeless case.
So we come to the third, most recent attempt which started with me emailing the deets through to HP the other day. ‘Deets’ by the way is short for ‘details’. I get this new found abbreviated jargon from coaching my girls who are all totes about the abbreviation. ‘Totes’ is short for ‘totally’, btw, which is short for…..oh forget it.
They emailed me back stating that although our desktop was no longer supported but did provide a link to an approved supplier that may have the part. They didn’t, because the desktop is no longer supported. Funny that.
Unsupported? My Grandmas nungas are unsupported and why not at her age aye, she’s earned the right to free boob if she wants, but it’s a bit fucken cheeky of HP to say the same about a bit of kit that I bet somewhere, right now, some Asian family is getting paid 50 cents a day to put together and dispatch. Now this is no Commodore 64 from 1984 either, it’s about four years old.
They want me to buy a new one, that’s why it’s not supported no more. But it’s a fine line playing that game because I’m so slutted with them I’m not going to buy HP ever again. I’ll instead buy some other brand that will undoubtedly go the same way in four years time. And you thought porn on the internet was free aye? What a fucken liberty.
It’s a conspiracy is what it is. I’ve always felt the same about Sony who I truly believe have a big red button on the wall somewhere at Sony HQ that when pressed, kills off all the previous incarnations of the Playstation meaning, if you have one, that you now have to upgrade to the new $800 model. That button sounds like a cash register when pushed.
Thankfully I have one more option and it, or rather he, works on the help desk, so I know he’ll know his shit. Unless he’s an ideas man, like me then I really am stuffed.
So no pressure Puffer, but it’s your cock up, my arse.
I'm pretty sure I know what the problem is...
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